I’m not quite sure how or why this happened to me yesterday, but I believe my left thumb is severely infected. Of course this means that I have suffered from irrational thoughts.
What if my thumb explodes? What if it just keeps growing, and a golf ball sized mass appears on my thumb, and it never goes away. What if they had to amputate? How would I live without one of my opposable thumbs? Playing guitar would be so difficult.
I can’t even bend it without pain. It really hurts, and it’s so stupid! I don’t have time to go to the doctor today. I couldn’t sleep well last night because of it. I took some tylenol, and slept holding a bag of frozen blueberries. I even tried pouring tea tree oil into the nail bed.
Will I be okay? Will this infection travel up my arm, and into my heart, and kill me? Is it cancer?
See what I mean about irrational thoughts? It’s crazy. Should I poke it, and try to put antibacterial ointment in it? Should I leave it alone? Should I ignore it? Should I try to see a doctor? Is this a real issue?
Yes! Yes it is a real issue. Probably a very small one that doesn’t need emergent attention. The logical part of my brain (that is very small of course) says, Linzy… It’s your thumb. You didn’t wake up with a golf ball, or something the size of a plum on your thumb. Maybe your body is fighting the infection. Maybe your body will absorb it. Maybe, just maybe you’ll be okay. My knuckle hurts now. Whatever it is, it’s traveling.
Any input would be greatly appreciated.
Linzy’s Big Red Thumb